Looking for help

[sapphirencotton]

Hello, my name is Robyn and I'm a single mom.
I'm about to be homeless, with my 2 daughters, ages 12 and 14.
I guess I should explain how we got to this place first.
My first marriage ended because their dad was doing drugs and calling me bad names in front of them. I was living with my parents at the time. The girls were 3 and 5 when I asked him to leave. Their dad doesn't do anything to help. At that time when I left him I had a good job and was doing okay living with my parents. Child support was mentioned in the divorce, and he did give us some money in the very beginning, but soon stopped. I didn't really pursue it because I knew he was working under the table anywhere he did work, and it seemed like trying to get money out of him would be too stressful.
I met what I thought was a great guy, older, more mature, family minded, had a great job, etc. We got married, everything was great. In 2005 we moved to Indiana with his company. They had closed the MD facility. We had already moved out of my parents place, but we felt the move would give us more freedom to live our lives. Houses were much cheaper in Indiana than MD, etc. I tried to keep my job, but the company did not want me to work from home when I had only been with them less than a year. My husband was able to work unlimited overtime though, and doing 5 12 hour shifts a week he was able to make the same as we both were making in MD. So we decided that I would stay home with the kids.
Well in Oct 08 he was arrested one morning as he was leaving the house to go to work. Apparently he had an outstanding warrant from 2000, which was red flagged in the police department system when a restraining order we had placed on his brother, who stayed with us for a brief time, was closed out. When he was arrested I found out that he had molested his daughter! His wife had brought charges against him and he CONFESSED to molesting her to the police. Once all his lies came out, I left him in Nov 08. I moved back home with my parents. We lost our house, 2 cars, etc. I was devastated.
When we returned to the Eastern Shore of MD to live with my parents I was unable to find work. I got on state assistance, food stamps and cash, and was required to make 20 job contacts per week and do 30 hours of volunteer work. From Nov 08 to May 09 I believe I only went on 2 job interviews. With the economy so bad there was just no work for me! And I think being a stay at home mom for a couple of years didn't help, because it left a big gap in my work experience.
In May 09 my parents got into a senior apartment complex. My best friend of 20+ years told me we could move into her house. She is a single mom also, with 2 kids. Her kids dad doesn't do anything for his kids either. She works in construction. Her youngest is 4 years old, and just started school, only going to school 2 hours a day.
The arrangement we have is that I stay home with the kids, cook, clean, while she works. This is saying her $1000 a month in child care expenses. To do this though, I had to give up the cash assistance, because I can't do 30 hours of volunteer work if I am home with her youngest child.
Recently she told me that she is unable to pay her mortgage, and is in fact 4 months behind and got a foreclosure notice.
So now we are about to be homeless again.
I've asked my family, but no one can take us in. We have no where to go. There is a 5 year waiting list for housing vouchers. I don't know what to do!!!
I am going to try to get into online college, and hopefully that will get us back on cash assistance, but that won't be enough to save the house.
I don't know where else to go for help!

[SallySue15]

Hello sapphirencotton,

I am sorry for the late response to your question.

There is a division of the Department of Health and Human Services (DHHS) that is designated exclusively to helping people collect child support from "dead-beat parents", it is www.acf.hhs.gov/programs/cse/extinf.html. This link is to a map of the United States, click on the link for your state (MD if you are still there) and it will give you contact information for the office in your area. This may help both you and your friend to collect money from the "dead-beat dads" in your lives.

The following site provides information on how to avoid house foreclosure in Maryland : www.mdhope.org/. Also the www.singlemomfinancialhelp.com/blog/state-assistance-programs-for-single-mothers/maryland/ page provides information on Maryland state financial assistance for single mothers.

Good luck, we are all wishing for the best possible outcome for you and your family!

~Sally~

[Cheryl Dosch]

Hello Robyn,
I just joined this site today but saw your post from April. My goodness you have been through a lot. If you are still looking for work I could use your help with my business. Please call me. Cheryl 908-268-5477