Child Support Rights

[cjp]

I am a single mom, who have been a relationship with my child's father on and off. he has been done a good job thus far about making sure I have a check for our daughter.

Recently the last past couple of months he has been about five to seven days late on the payment, and my finances are tight... I really cant afford to be late.. his excuse for not depositing the money in the account is that he has been busy. it happened last month.

Is this a reason to take him to court since he has been paying faithfully for six years?

Also if I take him to court I do not want to have to fight him tooth in nail with visitation, holidays, and such.

I was under the impression that if you are not married in the state of Indiana that the father does not have any custodial rights.

Can anyone please offer any suggestions?

[TNShannon]

I am not entirely sure of the laws in the state of Indiana (I'm in Tennessee), but I believe a father does have rights to visitation and such, regardless of whether you were married or not. If he's on the birth certificate, then the courts assume he has parental rights.

However, if you have had full custody of your daughter all this time, he would have to prove you are an unfit mother in order to get custody of her...so I seriously doubt you have anything to worry about there.

You really should have a child support agreement in place, one that is legally binding. It's awesome that he has been paying faithfully for that long, and you're lucky -- most single moms can't say they have had so much support from the father! But not having a legally binding order means that if he chooses to up and run, he can...and you have no say-so in the matter.

Instead of taking him to court, look into whether you can simply work an order through the child support office. That might be the easiest route, since it doesn't have the "confrontation" feeling of a court hearing. But then again, your state might require a trip before the judge. Either way, your Child Support Office can tell you what to expect.

If you're worried about the child support being late, you can ask that his payments be garnished. They would then come on a regular basis. But there might still be times when the payments are late, even with a court order in place...in Tennessee, the court doesn't kick in and "go after" someone until they are at least 30 days past due. With all the paperwork required, sometimes it takes longer than that.

But yes...you should get a court order, just to be safe. Remind your daughter's father that it's not about you...it's about her, and making certain her interests are protected, period. If he's been paying so well all this time, he must be a reasonable man...so maybe you can get this court order done without much trouble.

Tell us how it all goes? And good luck!